Why did the chicken cross the road?
I know… it’s an old joke.. but it’s worth the read… kaya… Basaaaaaa!!!!
Why did the chicken cross the road?
We have been baffled by this question for years. Yet until now, we couldn’t seem to find a definite answer. Why did the chicken cross the road? Here’s why according to some famous local personalities:
President GMA:
Hello Garci. Alamin mo nga kung bakit tumawid ang chicken.
Former Comelec Commissioner Virgilio Garcillano:
Sige po ma’am. Gagawan natin ng paraan. Ipapakidnap ko ang mga sisiw.
Susan Roces:
Let us remain calm. Let us follow the rule of law in determining the chicken’s motive for crossing the road.
Former President Joseph Estrada:
Ako na naman? Pati ba naman pagtawid ng manok, sa akin isisisi?
Press Secretary Ignacio Bunye:
That chicken which allegedly crossed the road is a fake. We have the real chicken in our coop!
Sen. Ping Lacson:
I have asked a foreign group to authenticate the taxonomic classification of that animal which crossed the road. No doubt, it was indeed a chicken.
Former Sen. Kit Tatad:
I did my own authentication. The chicken is real.
Bro. Mike Velarde:
Tiyak ‘yon.
NBI Director Reynaldo Wycoco:
Both chickens are fake.
Archbishop Oscar Cruz:
I have witnesses to prove that the chicken crossed the road.
Philippine Center for Investigative Journalism Blog:
We have the complete audio and video of the chicken crossing the road. Download here.
Atty. Allan Paguia:
I admit! I spliced the chicken but only for my post-graduate class. I didn’t fry it. In fact it’s still alive.
Cong. Chiz Escudero:
Once and for all, I am challenging the chicken. The public is waiting for its answer. Did it cross the road or not. If yes, why? If no, I still won’t believe it.
Atty. Samuel Ong:
It was looking for its mother. But the chicken won’t find it because I am keeping the mother of all chickens.
Sgt. Vidal Doble:
It was forced to cross the road.
Sen. Aquilino Pimentel:
Impeach the chicken!
Bayan Muna Rep. Teddy Casiño:
The chicken has betrayed the motorists’ trust when it crossed the road. Fry it!
Sandra Cam:
The chicken has laid dozens of chicken eggs across the road. I was personally asked by the chicken – which happened to be my close friend - to deliver the eggs to Congressmen Mikey and Iggy Arroyo. But please, do not insinuate that I had a special relationship with the chicken. It was just a friend.
Cong. Mikey Arroyo:
That chicken is a liar! I never received a single egg from that animal.
Cong. Ignacio Arroyo:
I will file a libel case against the chicken!
NTC Commissioner:
That’s fowl. You should not discuss that on air. Else, we shall revoke your franchise.
KBP:
Fowl or not, the NTC’s circular is curtailment of press freedom.